Courage (Sestina)

I stared at the wall and noticed the paper I’d torn.
The pieces that remained of my heart, to you they poured.
The darkness of my mind, to the surface it sprung.
I couldn’t remember the last time I’d felt like I’d truly lived.
The envy that I once had turned to brittle green.
Come out, come out and brighten my life my dear one.

How many months have gone by without a smile? Two, maybe one?
My heart, my soul, my dignity is now torn.
The forest in my mind is turning a dark green.
You wanted this. My feelings, my thoughts, my desires, here they are outwardly poured.
If I betray your memory would you have actually lived?
From the recesses of my hidden desires are where these thoughts sprung.

They say you’ll know when spring has sprung.
They will know, I’m not the only one.
Would they notice if the love in my heart died or lived?
The love, the humanity, the sanity, they’re now threads, ripped and torn.
Remember the bond we once shared? That’s now just regret openly poured.
That regret, it’s festered, bubbled, and became puss filled with a lime green.

Paint over those dead dreams, those dead hopes, those dead desires a life living green.
We’ll fool all of them. They’ll think I’ve given in. That into me, the living hope sprung.
They won’t know it, but everything they see, is just the lies I sneakily poured.
How is it that I’m the only one?
Am I a horrible person? Is my heart and mind so shattered that they’re eternally torn?
Why am I the only one who’s so wretched but has for this long lived?

Who determines who’s died in the past and who’s lived?
Fields of bronze wheat, waters of deep blue, and the never-ending jungle of green.
Grass that was filled with the sense of calmness, the pieces people ripped and had torn.
Don’t let the darkness hurt anyone else. Bring happiness to places where it had sprung.
Maybe not everybody cares, but the world can change. Whoever can help, anyone!
The skies will open and water will reign down like a glass over poured.

Tranquilize me. Calm me. Let the chaos die, the tears will no longer be poured.
It’s time that I take my life seriously. I wouldn’t want to die without having actually lived
It only takes a moment to change who you are. Just one.
Fill my heart with love and plants of green.
I think it’s time to step back a bit and see the kindness that’s sprung.
Time to mend the broken hearts, the hopelessness, everything that was previously torn.

Let’s get lost in the green forest; the water that was poured helped nourish its beauty.
I can’t believe the hope lived and now the happiness has sprung.Were you the one? Is it because of you that things are no longer ripped and torn.